Children and phone .. need or addiction!

The mobile phone today is no longer a luxury as it was in the past, but rather turned into a necessity in the lives of adults and children alike. In light of this wide spread, it is no longer strange to see children with their phones or tablets, through which they communicate, play and spend most of their time in front of the screens. But this phenomenon raises many questions about its impact on the child’s personality and psychological and social growth, and about how parents deal with the pressure of society on the one hand and the desires of their children on the other hand.

When the child sees that all his friends have smartphones or smart devices and he does not have the same, he has a feeling of deficiency and perhaps isolation. In such cases he begins to press his parents urgently to get a phone, considering that having the device has become a standard for belonging to the group. And if parents do not know how to face this position in a sound educational way, the child may feel inferior or inequality with his peers. That is why it is important for parents to explain their position clearly, and to show their child that each age has its needs, and that the phone is not a priority but may turn into a source of harm if it is used early. Setting the educational boundaries from a young age helps the child to distinguish between what is essential and necessary and what is perfect that can be dispensed with. This style of education is reflected negatively in the long term, as the child becomes less patience and less tolerated by the idea of ​​deprivation or postponing desires. On the medical point of view, Dr. Ibrahim Suleiman Suleiman, the doctor of the nervous system, pain and the global coach, warns of exposing children to screens before the age of three, considering that this directly affects the structure of the brain and its psychological state. And it confirms that the screen targets the brain areas responsible for feelings and perception, which makes the child fragile and more vulnerable to anger, stubbornness and weak academic concentration, and may even develop an electronic addiction due to the continuous brain secretion of dopamine. Dr. Suleiman adds that we cannot completely isolate children from the wrong social behavior towards phones, but we can determine safe times, with the need to avoid using the screen in the first half of the day and half the last hour before bed. He believes that the alternative to the phone should be a qualitative activity in which parents participate, so that he occupies at least three senses to give the child the pleasure and comfort he is looking for. But pressure is not only psychological or educational, but also economic. Buying a child’s phone imposes additional material burdens on the parents, most of whom feel guilty if he cannot fulfill the desires of his children. However, this position may turn into an opportunity to teach the child the meaning of conviction and managing desires, and understanding that material conditions do not always allow to obtain everything we want. Peace, and she is a mother of two children, tells her experience and says: “I was initially determined not to buy tablets for my son, but I found myself in the face of a society that imposes on me the opposite. By deficiency, they do not have the same as their peers. “I cannot isolate them from their surroundings or cancel my social life. Today I allow them to use devices but within specific dates, and I monitor the content they see, and I encourage them on educational or interactive games such as drawing and arithmetic.” This certificate honestly reflects what many mothers and fathers suffer between their desire to protect their children and the pressure of society that requires that the screen be part of the life of every child. Here, the role of role model is highlighted. Children will not be convinced of moving away from the screens if they see their parents steeped in them all the time. And as Dr. Ibrahim says: “The worst model for the family is the one who provides his children everything that is material, but he overlooks the importance of the qualitative time with them. The child needs a balance between the forbidden and the permitted, and to see in his family a real behavioral role model.” In the end, it can be said that the phone is not an absolute or permanent friend. It is a tool that can be useful or harmful according to how it is used. Children today live in a digital world that cannot be separated from their lives, but the responsibility of the parents is to direct its use and to place it with clear boundaries. Proper education is based on love and firmness together, and to spend a qualitative time with children gives them true happiness away from the screen, and it may be a simple step today capable of changing the future and behavior of our child when he grows up.